Daily Thought: Anita's Box

I know we have all heard the myth about Pandora's box. Basically Pandora's box is 4 walls that form a box and hold all of the worlds evils. When opened, the contents of the box can reek havoc on the world. I believe we as women all contain a Pandora's box of our own in our minds. And instead of holding the world's evils this box contains all of the unaddressed, and compartmentalized feelings we harbor.

I will go ahead and call this box Anita's box. Yes, Anita Baker, Anita. We all know Aunties Anita is good for a heart wrenching love song sung in an octave that only she can pull off. One of the most known of these songs is "Caught Up In The Rapture." I like to use this phrase as a metaphor for those times you are scrambling and dealing with feelings that seemingly come from no where. But the rapture does not descend upon us like a swarm of locusts when we least expect it. It slowly builds up on us.

That dude you met that you weren't worried about until he stopped worrying about you. Or that person that never quite goes away. Or that moment that you believed to be a fleeting moment of lust. You stuck all these feelings into Anita's box, never to be thought of again. Until one day, that glass of wine, or 6…or that Toni Braxton song rips the lid off Anita's box, and all those feelings attack you at once. 

There is a way to make sure this never happens. The only way to prevent a sneak attack from the rapture is to deal with feelings head on. Yes, we will all be caught up in some kind of rapture or another at some point, it's human nature. But when you deal with those feelings and skip to the next song on Anita's greatest hits you won't have to worry about hiding Anita's box so far away that no one will ever find it to open it back up again.

 -Becks

Happy Holidays

Twas the night of the Ugly Holiday sweater party
And all through the house, not a creature was twerking (yet) not even a mouse

The egg nog was made and spiked with care
In hopes that everyone attending would soon be there

Buster was nestled all snug in his bed
While visions of someone dropping some food on the floor danced in his head.

Mrs. Avery came downstairs, a full holiday ensemble in tack
While Mr. Avery was watching the TV loud as hell in the back

When the front door bell rang with such a ding
In came the guests with all the bottles and appetizers they promised to bring

Becky turned off the Boyz II Men holiday music
And turned on something a bit more ratchet, in hopes that everyone would lose it

Now Lindsey! now, Ashley! now, Willie and Krystle!
On, Trina! On, Nikkole! On, Jamol and Brittany!

Don’t you dare stand on top of the couch, or get any jean marks on the wall!
Or Mr. Avery will be screaming: Dash away! Dash away all!"

All the nog was drank, and the dancing had died down
It was time for everyone to get the hell up out of town

I heard someone’s tires screech as they drove out of sight,
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"

Daily Insight: Realize

A conversation with friends bought up a point I may of already mentioned in a previous post, but it’s so important I will reiterate. When you take the time to realize how blessed you are and focus on all the good in life, there’s no space for anything negative. I know that it’s not as easy as it sounds, but it is so, so very important.

Whether it’s just laughing at your mistakes in the moment, waking up every morning and just thanking God for the day, or taking the time to think good thoughts when you start to scramble. These small things will help you keep your head above water. I can’t speak for everyone. But I know I am blessed and highly favored. And things are falling into place in my life.

If I can’t focus on those things I need to have my brain rewired.

-Becks

Daily Insight: Days Are Not To Be Wished Away

A wise man once said “the trick is to enjoy life. Don’t wish away your days, waiting for better ones ahead.” Summer 2013 was really one of the best summers I’ve ever had. And that’s a lot coming from a person who has some good times.

Something happens to a person when there are so many exciting things going on. You find yourself in those slower days wanting to fast forward life to the next big event or reminiscing on the past, but in those moments I have to remember that the present is a time to be cherished.

Not every day is going to be perfect or exciting, but every single day is a blessing. Believe the small moments are going to add up to a much bigger picture when you take the time to piece them together. Life is a constantly growing and evolving thing. Each day is a link in the chain, and the chain can never be completed if days are skipped…every link is necessary.

-Becks

Daily Insight: Moment Of Clarity

Ahhhhh another year and another birthday have come around. I turned 26 on Tuesday, and I must admit this was a birthday that I was a little apprehensive about. Only because in my mind 26 is the milestone birthday where 30 is right around the corner.

In my irrational mind this was a scary thought. I say irrational now, because after several conversations with family and friends I realized 26 is a grown up birthday, and there comes a sense of peace. Yes, I am still full on scrambling but I feel as though I am scrambling in all the right directions. I am very settled in who I am becoming, the decisions I am making and where I am going.

This was reflected so much in the days leading up to my birthday. In those short days I had taken a step on faith for a career move, turned up with some of my best friends, and let the top back and thank God for the day. On my actual birthday the genuine love, admiration, and well wishes were amazing. It reassured to me that I am having a positive impact on the people in my life that matter the most. Their refection of me is all I could ever ask it to be. I am so grateful for all I have, and all I am working towards.

This will be the best year yet. Toasting to 26 and all it has to bring.

-Becks

Daily Insight: Be The Change You Wish To See

A wiseman once said "sour apple bitter bitches I ain't messing with them." I know this is not the most eloquently written statement, but Gucci Man was spitting truth none the less.

When life throws us some shade, as it tends to do from time to time, you can't let that change your outlook. You must keep an optimistic, or positive view no matter how hard it may be at the time. At the end of the day we are all attracting exactly what we give out.

If you give out sour apple bitter bitch vibes, best believe you'll attract people just like that. If you believe all men or women ain't shit you'll attract those kinds of people.

Life is all about reciprocity, don't get caught out here handing out and receiving bad vibes from life, cause ain't no one, not even a half illiterate, gold teeth wearing, rapper such as Gucci mane ain't messing with you.

-Becks

Daily Insight: The Curse Of Eve

Women have to deal with a lot. Between cramps, runs in panty hoes, spanx, and bra underwire I'm sure we are the species that has it the hardest. With all that said there's something especially hard to deal with, that I'm sure is a curse handed down to us specifically from the Almighty cause Eve just had to bite that damn apple.

That curse is the curse of dwelling on something and thinking about it over and over until the point of madness. Ask any woman if this curse has ever haunted her and I'm sure she will say yes.

This may occur when she tells the Dominican hairstylist to go ahead and spray that extra oil sheen in her hair...and regrets this decision when she's walking around looking like Steven Segal for a week.

Or this may occur when she sees those cute shoes in her size but decides to do the responsible thing and wait until it goes on sale, and comes back to find that every other biddie in the tri-state area wasn't being as frugal and she can't find her size anywhere.

But this is most prevalent in the case of "should of said this, should of done that" when it comes to affairs of the heart. I'm sure Aphrodite the Goddess of love had it out for us child bearing beings when it came to the emotion of love. There's always going to be those times where you spend time with, or talk to a person who has that special effect on you...and something may go wrong, or everything goes right. Either way you spend every waking moment of the next couple of days thinking and rethinking of what you could of said or should of done to make this person feel where you're coming from.

Believe me I suffer from it too..and no matter how many other distractions you have your mind always wanders back to the "should I of told him how I felt? What if I didn't say this? What if I did this?" Nothing will take those questions away...

You just have to be settled in the fact that you're not the only one thinking this way. Eve did it to all of us.

-Becks